Short Funny Sayings Home
Top Ten Funniest Sayings
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"Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting."
Funny Short Sayings by, Finley Peter Dunne.
"I ain't sleeping. I'm just taking a good look at the insides of my eyelids."
Funny Short Sayings by, Johathan Raban.
"Remember that nobody will ever get ahead of you as long as he is kicking you in the seat of the pants."
Funny Short Sayings by, Walter Winchell.
"We have found that it's much easier to restrain our wrath when the other fellow is bigger than we are."
Funny Short Sayings by, Anonymous.
"By the time we're ready to admit we've reached middle age, we're beyond it."
Funny Short Sayings by, Anonymous.
"The most dangerous position in which to sleep is with your feet on your office desk."
Funny Short Sayings by, Anonymous.
"Never stand between a dog and the hydrant."
Funny Short Sayings by, John Peers.
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."
Funny Short Sayings by, Bill Cosby
"Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it."
Funny Short Sayings by, Lyndon B. Johnson
"Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning."
Funny Short Sayings by, Anonymous.
"You tried, and you failed, so the lesson is, never try."
Funny Short Sayings by, Homer J. Simpson.
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