Short Funny Sayings Home
Top Ten Funniest Sayings
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"The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is
generally employed only by small children and large nations."
Funny Short Sayings by, David Friedman.
"I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets."
Funny Short Sayings by, Dave.
"Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand."
Funny Short Sayings by, Unknown.
"Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one."
Funny Short Sayings by, Anonymous.
"Never wear a backward baseball cap to an interview unless applying for the job of umpire."
Funny Short Sayings by, Dan Zevin.
"Its been a rough day. I got up this morning .... put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom."
Funny Short Sayings by, Rodney Dangerfield.
"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president."
Funny Short Sayings by, Hillary Clinton (commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents).
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we
didn't."
Funny Short Sayings by, Erica Jong.
"I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife."
Funny Short Sayings by, Ilie Nastase.
"The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house."
Funny Short Sayings by, Jeff Foxworthy.
"He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone."
Funny Short Sayings by, Anonymous.
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